morals or steady relationship no longer the issue

I don’t really care about gender issues, as it is anybody’s free choice, what I am concerned about is that the reduction of steady relationships systematically breaks down the security of our country and society.

  1. the more kids you have, the more friends they acquire from backgrounds you do not really know much about. You also are not able to stop your children from going out as it is against the law and seen as keeping someone hostage against their will. You are not even legally able to stop your child from going out, even if they are drug addicts and only want more drugs.
  2. the more kids you have from different partners, the less you know what outside influences they are under and your own personal integrity gets endangered.

To 1. The best example to this is my learning disabled daughter, who was never formally statemented whilst at school. She always completely lied how she spend her time, until she was pregnant and not even then did she tell me the truth about her relationships until years later. But hat is OK under the law as it has to do with personal freedom and privacy.

To 2. If you are in a security sensitive occupation, all those relationships various partners and children and their relatives form, combined with less financial seucrity because all these extra children cost extra money, weaken your own secure lifestyle. You just imagine how many more people you share your life experiences with if you have several children from severeal partners who in turn also have relatives and friends attached to them. You become more susceptible to corruption.

I don’t think that just having a job is the issue any longer. Just having a job doesn’t solve people’s problems with forming good relationships in their personal lives and keep steady and secure relationships going.

broken heart love sad

Photo by burak kostak on Pexels.com

Less secure housing, less secure jobs, less steady relationships but an increase in gang culture and crime.

According to the Guardian in 2002 a third of British men had a criminal record. That does not include cautions.

The more people divorce, the less steady and secure becomes the world the children live in. The more people change partners the more do the children from these relationships have to adjust to constantly changing social issues whilst that takes away from their ability to concentrate on learning.

Can’t go back

Can completely understand the sentiments of the Durrell woman, who asked herself what she did wrong, when her kids displayed an attitude attributed to single mothers in the old days.

She loved her husband and was blessed by the fact that he had died whilst she still loved him. He must have been a good man.

It is very hard to raise kids with a husband in a cvilised society if that husband is a more than liberal dreamer.

My husband turned out to be one of those and had no discipline and no ambitions.

I don’t know what’s worst; mourning a loving husband or living with a total dreamer who is incapable of earning any money.

Better to have good memories than bad ones.

Not liking hot climates, going to Greece or south of the Alps is not an option. I stick it out in Britain, though my then divorced husband died years ago of cancer.

During my marriage I was always the disciplinarian. My husband didn’t mind his five children swinging on the handles of underground traines during long journeys through London, whilst I tried my best to get them to sit down.

His favourite modern song was ‘another brick in the wall‘ by Pink Flloyd in defiance of education.

That constant state of surrealistic freedom made it hard for the children to fit in. The memory of the father who allowed everything is overpowering.

Now expectations have changed, children have no choice but to make a working life the rule and looking back to the Hippie years of the baby boomers is not an option.

The influence of the father is always very strong and nothing is harder for a parent than to overcome a non-disciplined head of the family who can’t hold down a job.

Schools should teach children the rules of life and not just subjects in the sciences and art or drama. How to earn money, how to pay bills, how to navigate society are lessons some children do not learn at home.

I found that those kids who want to listen to sensible advice are the only ones making life succesful and understand that a career is the only way to improve one’s lot.

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